Two Question Tuesday

While I sit and debate my next move in this Publishing Game, I was thinking about something. Two things, actually... Books and Pie.

Question 1.) If a new writer approached you and asked: "What one book would you suggest I read to really grasp what writing a great work of fiction is all about?"  -  Which book would you recommend?

Question 2.) What is your favorite kind of pie?


My answers:

Question 1.) Harry Potter and the Scorcerer's Stone (YA) or The Firm (Adult)

Question 2.) Peanut Butter

Tightening Up Your Manuscript

I've been doing some heavy editting, as well as some heavy reading. I shouldn't have printed my manuscript out on 20 pound paper. But I digest. *burp* Excuse me.

While I was revising, I discovered something... and it's really helped in pruning my novel. It concerns emotions in the form of facial expressions. This is something I over use SO much. But in the books I've been reading, facial expressions that portray emotion are toned way down. Instead, different story elements are used to get that emotion to the reader.

Examples:

1.) Instead of something like: 'Her honest eyes made it seem as though she believed me, but her runny nose gave away the truth', you could get this across with dialogue, maybe this girl stutters when she lies. Or with action, like when she blows her nose, everyone knows she's not telling the truth.

2.) Or instead of 'His facial expression morphed into anger', try some action; 'He clenched his jaw so tight it caused tobacco to dribble down his chin. Using a stiff finger, he slathered the lumpy brown goop back into his mouth and spat it on me'.

3.) Or instead of 'When she took his popcorn, she noticed his eyes go wide'. How about some dialogue: 'Gimme my popcorn, Grandma! You old bag!"

But remember, sometimes you HAVE to go into your character's head in order to get his/her's emotion across to the reader. Why? Because some charcters don't show emotion. Need an example? Okay.

Let's say your protag is an elderly Scotsman who spends his days standing along the side of the road, smoking homemade cigarettes. The guy keeps everything inside, bottled up tight. His expression NEVER changes. Even if a car came careening right at him, he still wouldn't show his feelings.

What? You think a protag like that is unrealistic? Whatever!





But back to the topic of character emotions, there are only so many ways to get feelings across by describing facial expressions and eye movements. And isn't that sort of like TELLING the reader instead of SHOWING the reader anyway?

So after you finish that first or second draft, go through the book specifically looking for these types of descriptions and see if you can eliminate a few, replace them with action, dialogue or something else. It will make your book read faster by getting rid of these reduntant elements.

The Great Library Giveaway

If you know of a school library desperately in need of some great Midde Grade books, click the link below to nominate them for THE GREAT LIBRARY GIVEAWAY brought to you by the folks at From The Mixed-Up Files .

http://www.fromthemixedupfiles.com/2010/10/the-great-library-giveaway/

You can find all of the details there, but below is a blurb about the giveaway.

On the GREAT LIBRARY GIVEAWAY post (linked above) simply add a comment with the name of the library you’d like to see us ship these books to. Only one nomination per person, please.  However, you may earn up to three additional entries for either the same library or a different one by tweeting/blogging/facebooking this giveaway.  For additional entries to count, each must be in a separate comment with the link and the name of the library listed.

Here is a list of the books we've collected so far.

Hardcovers (37 total)

The 39 Clues Book 8: The Emperor’s Code by Gordan Korman

Any Which Wall by Laurel Snyder

As Simple as It Seems by Sarah Weeks

The Beef Princess of Practical County by Michelle Houts

The Big One-Oh by Dean Pitchford

Elijah of Buxton by Christopher Paul Curtis

Escape Under the Forever Sky by Eve Yohalem

The Evolution of Calpurnia Tate by Jacqueline Kelly

The Fabled Fourth Graders of Aesop Elementary School by Candace Fleming

The Fantastic Secret of Owen Jester by Barbara O’Connor

The Girl Who Could Fly by Victoria Forester

The Healing Spell by Kimberley Griffiths Little

How I, Nicky Flynn, Finally Get a Life (and a Dog) by Art Corriveau

I So Don’t Do Makeup by Barrie Summy

It’s Raining Cupcakes by Lisa Schroeder

Jungle Crossing by Sydney Salter

The Last Snake Runner by Kimberley Griffiths Little

The Lost Conspiracy by Frances Hardinge

lucky breaks by Susan Patron

Mallory in the Spotlight by Laurie Friedman

Nightshade City by Hilary Wagner

Noonie’s Masterpiece by Lisa Railsback

Palace Beautiful by Sarah DeFord Williams

Penny Dreadful by Laurel Snyder

The Pepins and Their Problems by Polly Horvath

Princess for Hire by Lindsey Leavitt

Red Pyramid (Book 1 in the Kane Chronicles) by Rick Riordan

Scones and Sensibility by Lindsay Eland

Soar, Elinor! by Tami Lewis Brown

The Summer of Moonlight Secrets by Danette Haworth

Tortilla Sun by Jennifer Cervantes

The Total Tragedy of a Girl Named Hamlet by Erin Dionne

Touch Blue by Cynthia Lord

Under the Green Hill by Laura L. Sullivan

Violet Raines Almost Got Struck by Lightning by Danette Haworth

Warriors The New Prophecy #2: Moonrise by Erin Hunter

What Happened on Fox Street by Tricia Springstubb

Paperbacks (11 total)

The Brilliant Fall of Gianna Z. by Kate Messner

Dare To Dream!: 25 ExtraordinaryLives by Sandra McLeod Humphrey

Football Hero by Tim Green

Haven by Beverly Patt

Hot Issues, Cool Choices: Facing Bullies, Peer Pressure, Popularity, and Put-Downs by Sandra McLeod Humphrey

Hugging the Rock by Susan Taylor Brown

Karma Bites by Stacy Kramer and Valerie Thomas

 Mudville by Kurtis Scaletta

Nice and Mean by Jessica Leader

Saving Lilly by Peg Kehret

Up and Down the Scratchy Mountains by Laurel Snyder

Friday Five - Surprises!

 1. Yesterday was the final day for the local ice cream shop to be open this year. I sat at the picnic table while my wife waited for our cones. I ordered a large chocolate soft serve. Boy was surprised when she brought back this…

 

2.) I gave my brother a copy of my latest manuscript to read the other day. When I came back an hour later to see how he was enjoying it, I was surprised to find this…

 

3.) I remember, when I was a kid, I was at my grandparent's house. I couldn't find grandpa.  I asked grandma and she said, “Oh, he’s finally yanking those weeds behind the garage. I’ve been at him all summer to do it.” When I ran back there, I was surprised to find this…

 

 4.) I was peeling an orange for breakfast this morning, and lookie what I got...

 

 5.) When my buddy, Bryan Reardon  , and I were challenged to make this impossible basketball shot, we was surprised when this happened….