Jabba The Hut

So... this is how Jabba REALLY gets around. Kinda sad.

When Breakfast Talks Back to You

While cooking my usual eggs this morning (sunny side up), I heard this weird whispering... I could have sworn it was saying, "How about some oatmeal?" And when I looked into the pan...

Similiar?

Diving Team Memories

It's been years and years since I was on my High School Diving Team, but someone dug up a video of me doing my world famous dive. I called this one "My Shoe!"

Never put on a blindfold... especially in front of your best friend.

I'm Not Sure if this is even funny!

I actually took this picture... not far from where I work. There's no road there... it's in front of a cemetery. Is the street department THAT sure there's no outlet once you're inside of that fence?

Ultimate Dog Tease

I'm sure most of you have seen this... but if you haven't, it's probably the funniest Youtube video I've ever seen.



Hope you all have a nice weekend!

Friday Five - Things I Want

1.) A Sausage Coated in Tater Tots


2.) An Anatomical Sleeping Bag


3. This Guy's Charisma!!!



4. A lawn that looks like this... no weeds at ALL!!!


5. A Wooden Spoon

I just love dogs!

I watched this video with my two youngest daughters the other day and we LAUGHED and LAUGHED. This poor little pooch... I've never seen a dog look so ashamed.

And you've gotta love the background music!

Here's Why...

I refuse to go to the beach. Ever again. And my family wouldn't let it go.

When I tried to explain why... they wouldn't believe me. When I said it's because of the wildlife running rampant through the sand, they shook their heads. So, I went through the old box of film at my mom's house and found this clip from my very last visit to the beach. They no longer argue with me.

100 Funniest Movies... I don't think so

The folks over at College Humor took a poll of their readers to generate a list of the 100 funniest movies of all time. http://www.collegehumor.com/bestcomedy

This list (IMO) is a real mess. I’ll admit, I haven’t seen all of these movies (I’ve underlined the ones I haven’t), but still… movies like Saving Sara Marshall wasn’t funny. Neither was Ghostbusters 2, or Euro Trip. And Dodgeball… DODGEBALL wasn’t funny at ALL!!! Or maybe that’s just me.

And I’ve listed a few movies that SHOULD have made the list at the bottom. What do you think?

100. The Wedding Singer
99. American Pie 2
98. Revenge of the Nerds
97. Number Two
96. Dazed and Confused
95. Mr. Deeds
94. Coming To America
93. Black Sheep
92. The Jerk
91. Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World
90. Little Miss Sunshine
89. Clerks II
88. Waiting
87. Beverly Hills Cop
86. Dude, Where’s My Car
85. Me, Myself and Irene
84. Road Trip
83. Christmas Vacation
82. Half-Baked
81. Scary Movie
80. Dogma
79. Blades of Glory
78. Van Wilder
77. The Naked Gun 2-1/2
76. Rush Hour
75. Home Alone
74. Accepted
73. Planes, Trains and Automobiles
72. History of the World Part I
71. Hot Tub Time Machine
70. Young Frankenstein
69. Bill & Teds Excellent Adventure
68. Jackass
67. Kick Ass
66. Euro Trip
65. Napoleon Dynamite
64. Get Him to the Greek
63. Zack and Miri Make a Porno
62. Beerfest
61. The Other Guys
60. Ghostbusters II
59. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back
58. The Mask
57. The Simpson’s Movie
56. Meet The Parents
55. Something About Mary
54. Men in Black
53. Big Daddy
52. Wayne’s World II
51. Blazing Saddles
50. Clerks
49. Liar, Liar
48. Borat
47. Ace Ventura – When Nature Calls
46. Tommy Boy
45. Life of Brian
44. I Love You, Man
43. American Pie
42. Ground Hog Day
41. The Blues Brothers
40. Forgetting Sara Marshall
39. The Waterboy
38. Robin Hood – Men In Tights
37. Team America
36. Role Models
35. The Naked Gun
34. Talladega Nights
33. Harold & Kumar go to White Castle
32. Billy Madison
31. Knocked Up
30. Tropic Thunder
29. Animal House
28. Caddyshack
27. Step Brothers
26. The Pineapple Express
25. Austin Powers – The Spy Who Shagged Me
24. Ferris Bueller’s Day off
23. Hot Fuzz
22. Ace Ventura
21. Wedding Crashers
20. Super Troopers
19. Dumb & Dumber
18. The Big Lebowski
17. South Park – Bigger, Longer & Uncut
16. Zoolander
15. Ghostbusters
14. Airplane!
13. Wayne’s World
12. Austin Powers – International Man of Mystery
11. Spaceballs
10. Office Space
9. Dodgeball
8. Old School
7. Happy Gilmore
6. Shaun of the Dead
5. 40 Year Old Virgin
4. Superbad
3. Anchorman – The legend of Ron Burgundy
2. The Hangover
1. Monty Python and the Holy Grail

What about these?

48 hours
Uncle Buck
PeeWee’s Big Adventure
Stir Crazy
Strange Brew 
Weird Science
Vacation
Stripes
Meatballs
The Breakfast Club

Two Things

1.) For fans of Stephen King (Like Me!!!), Scribner announced details about his next novel. To quote Charlie Sheen... WINNING!

Scribner will release Stephen King’s next novel November 8. The publisher calls 11/22/63 “ a 1,000-page tour de force” that “richly imagines a present day high school teacher, Jake Epping who travels back in time to try and prevent the JFK assassination.”

Jake Epping is a thirty-five-year-old high school English teacher in Lisbon Falls, Maine, who makes extra money teaching adults in the GED program. He receives an essay from one of the students—a gruesome, harrowing first person story about the night 50 years ago when Harry Dunning’s father came home and killed his mother, his sister, and his brother with a hammer. Harry escaped with a smashed leg, as evidenced by his crooked walk.

Not much later, Jake’s friend Al, who runs the local diner, divulges a secret: his storeroom is a portal to 1958. He enlists Jake on an insane—and insanely possible—mission to try to prevent the Kennedy assassination. So begins Jake’s new life as George Amberson and his new world of Elvis and JFK, of big American cars and sock hops, of a troubled loner named Lee Harvey Oswald and a beautiful high school librarian named Sadie Dunhill, who becomes the love of Jake’s life—a life that transgresses all the normal rules of time.

2.) There are too many cameras on the planet... they catch everything. For example, someone filmed my very first attempt at bobsledding. How embarassing!

The "Do Dogs Go To Heaven?" Debate Rages On

I'm not sure where this happened, but two churches, across the street from each other, have been debating about whether Dogs Go To Heaven. (I retyped the "Our Lady of Martyrs" signs because they might be hard to read.)

The opinions expressed here are for amusement only.

 All Dogs Go To Heaven
    

God Loves All His Creations, Dogs Included

    

Catholic Dogs Go to Heaven, Presbyterian Dogs Can Talk To Their Pastor
   

Free Dog Souls with Conversion
  

All Rocks Go To Heaven

Combining/Manipulating Words

I've noticed lately, that the news people have been combining and manipulating words to form new words for their reports. I thought that sort of thing was only used by fiction writers. Words like...

Sharting - When you thought you were only going to fart, but ended up sh%ting in your pants.

Bromance - Two platonic guy friends hanging out.

Manstrating - The monthly male cycle.

Just this week I heard words like this on the radio during the news report. Words like...

E-lationship - A relationship that exists solely through emails

Hacktivist - An activist who shows his displeasure by hacking into websites.

Can you think of any others. I find these words fascinating!!!

Still One of My Favorites!!!!

Where Do Ice Cream Cones come from?

Friday Five - Getting Ready for the Holidays!!!

1.) First I get out those comfy socks I just love to wear when it gets cold.

 (Notice I just shaved!)

2.) We string up some outdoor decorations. I don't like it gaudy, so we keep it simple



3. Next we put up the tree!!



4. Throw on a little Christmas Music



5. Break out the sweater my brother made for me last Christmas***



***My brother not only makes Christmas Sweaters, he's a professional Christmas Sweater Model. Here's the most recent shot from his portfolio, for those interested.

She MUST take after her mother!

I was driving my 13 year old daughter to her drum lesson last night. I missed the teacher's house, so I pulled down a side street to turn around. There was a sign on the side of this narrow road. I'm sure you've seen it before...



My daughter asks me, "What's that sign mean?"

Shocked, I ask her, "What do you think it means?"

With a straight face, she responds, "There's no electricity."

This can't be MY daughter!

Vampires

I still enjoy a good vampire story. I do. THE PASSAGE, for example, was great.

But... if vampires ever "jumped the shark", as they say, it was probably right after this moment in history.

Thankful Thursday - Random Edition

1.) I'm THANKFUL that they don't make anymore of those Airplane/Naked Gun movies. I mean, I loved those films, but I can pretty much guarantee they'd use this bit if they were making a new one.

A group of important government officials are gathered around a conference table. Something horribly wrong is taking place in world. The President of the United States struts into the room. Everyone stands, waiting to be brought up to speed.

The President says, "Okay, people. Here's the situation." He points to the door and this guy strolls into the room.




2. I'm THANKFUL that a few good friends will take up their valuable free time to read a manuscript that just might suck. So THANK YOU (you know who you are).

3. I'm THANKFUL I was never this stupid.



4. I'm THANKFUL for books that my daughter and I are both totally enjoying.

 PARANORMALCY by Kiersten White

 TWELFTH GRADE KILLS by Heather Brewer

5. I'm THANKFUL that I finally finished filling out the list our Marriage Counselor assigned as homework.

Friday Five Without a Theme

1.) I found out something yesterday that DISGUSTED me!!! But I'm told that plenty of people do this. So let's find out!


2.) I'm fired up for   this year. Starting brand new story. YA SciFi/Horror called THE BROOD. I hope it's the next book I finish, but I'll know more after the first 30 pages. I do have a backup MG idea if this one putters out.

It's funny how we always feel the LOVE for the new idea... but is it the kind of LOVE that can sustain us for a year of writing/revising.

3.) No! No! No! This is NOT a proper use for the wonderful Eyeball!



4. Eveyone has a favorite drink. A drink that just oozes refreshment. For me that drink is FUZE 'Banana Colada'. Put it in the freezer for about an hour, then sip away. Mm, mm.

5. Did I ever tell you guys about my Karate skills? No? Well... I never actually took any classes, but that summer, I think I was about 8 or 9, that my parents decided they wanted to tour the country in a piece of crap RV, I began to practice that ancient martial art. And I took to it like white to a charcoal briquette.

Once I felt confident in my skills, I wanted to showcase them. When the RV broke down for the sixth time that day, I bravely stepped outside and began my first public display.